Completely agree with your observations Baz, some soulies are very paranoid , I've had conversations with non soulies who've never heard the music before think it's really great and catchy and want to hear more.
I can remember when the 'Soul Patrol' was on the Johnny Vaughn (who is into Soul, by the way) show and a few blokes at work the next day said it was great and they loved the Northern Soul dancers and thought the music was good.
Anyway, I think youngsters, especially today are very tolerant of any underground musical scene and are keen to learn. Not the silly little teenage girls cacked in make-up (my 2 daughters for a start!) but lads who are into Hip-Hop etc....believe me, they know who Curtis Mayfield, Impressions, O'Jays....blah blah are that's for sure.
Northern Soul encompasses a vast array of styles and to be honest, some does sound dated, but you blast Luther Ingram 'If It's All The same To You Babe' out of the speakers and tell me anyone who's half hip (dated word!!??) doesn't feel the quality, a quality that will never date no matter how many musical styles they invent!
Soul is a very hip, happening, dope, phat, bad...(or whatever word you choose to describe it by, young or old) musical genre.
Quality always shines through!
But...I can see how some of the great unwashed perceive Northern Soul, I remember a mate of mine convincing these two lovely ladies we met in a local pub to accompany us to an all-nighter, I presume they thought "ooh, some dancing to soul music, sounds alright".... they paid their entrance fee (about £8) and got the shock of their lives! They did like the music but couldn't understand the dancing! Suffice to say we didn't get our legs over that night!!!!