My Book

[Guest Swish]

Ok after lots of tellings off for not ever finishing it in all these years (especially at Torch reunion last saturday)

Heres another clipping:

One morning I left the Saints and Sinners with everyone else when it shut but

I couldn't find my mate John , with whom I'd gone there with the previous

night, anywhere. In fact, come to think of it, I'd not seen him since about three

that morning. I asked everyone, but although everyone remembered him being

there earlier noone had seen him for ages. I thought it was odd because he

was supposed to be going back to Leeds with me. I went down New Street

with a load of the crowd, and we sat in the buffet as usual, smoking and

talking about the night, waiting for our various trains, to all parts of the

country.

Eventually trains came and people went, but there was still no sign of John.

I went down to platform 6 to wait for the train to Leeds.

Of course, in the world of nighters and gear it was not really unusual for

someone to not be where you'd expect them to be. You could easily, say,

meet a load of your mates from Norwich, and end up going somewhere with

them, or get pulled by the squad or police. You could forget where you were

supposed to be or who you were supposed to be with because of the gear you

took, or indeed if you hadn't forgotten, you maybe liked it better where you

were right now, then where, or who, you were supposed to be. We all

understood this. It wasn't like normal people with normal plans.

A lot of it was "Let's go where the music takes me", to pinch a line out of one

of Jimmy James's songs So often when someone wasn't there, you just

wondered where he was, but didn't worry about where he was

Don't take this to mean we were all morons and didn't know what we were

doing, its that the gear made you fearless, happy and you knew the others

understood this same feeling, because they were all doing the same as you.

Of course there were exceptions. Serious situations were different, and a

DEFINITE promise to turn up was almost certainly kept to, then you may worry

if they weren't there, the rest of the time you just took it as it came.

So I'm sat on New Street station waiting for my train, wondering where

John is, when suddenly he appears!

He's got two holdalls that appear to be breaking his arms.

"Swish. How many records did you sell last night?"

"Not many, actually John. Why?"

"Add up the value of the records in your box".

"There's quite a lot of money there John, about thirty quid."

John chewed his lip non-stop and made a put-put sound all the time.

It used to drive me nuts.

"I'll have 'em all", he says, and opens the first holdall. It's full of ten bob bits.

He counts out sixty ten bob bits. I put them all in my pockets.

My pockets weigh a ton.

He shows me the other holdall, it's jam-packed with cigarettes.

"Go on then. John, tell me the story".

"Well, I left Saints and Sinners about 3.30 to do a chemist, found one

but I couldn't get in so I did the pub next door., and this is what I ended

up with."

"Nice one John", I remarked.

"Swish, do you fancy a lift with us instead of waiting for the train?"

"Oh, you've got a lift"?

"Well put it this way, I've got a car parked outside the station forecourt,

It's quite a nice one too".

So I went outside with him, and there was the car. It was a brand new Daimler!

He'd not only done the pub, he'd nicked, the Daimler as well. Like you do!

Six of us got in it.

There was a problem with the electric windows.

They kept going going up and down on their own, which was a bit of a shock,

seeing as how I never even knew such a thing as electric windows even

existed! It was sorted out somehow, and soon we were on our way out of

Birmingham. John gave us 60 cigs apiece, much to our delight.

Away we went, not frightened whatsoever, but when they all started saying,

Get the sounds on Swish" I thought it was a bit stupid because they had the

windows wound down and I thought it would attract attention.

"I tell you what, Swish, I'll take all the B roads home, where there's

not likely to be coppers, so wait till we get out of Brum then put the

discotron on.

So we did. There we were, speeding along, sounds full blast, when

John spots a hitchhiker at the side of the road.

"Look at that poor geyser, let's give him a lift", shouts John.

"Are you fucking crazy?" I shouted back.

John ignores me and pulls up, and in he gets, though now there are seven of us.

"Here mate, have forty cigs", offers John.

"No thank you, I don't smoke", replies our new friend.

I don't know what he thought. Six kids in a brand new Daimler,

records on full blast, and 500 cigs littered about the car.

Several miles on, we saw we saw a cop car with two coppers in it facing us

on our side of the road. I was certain we'd be stopped. I turned the sounds

down. We got nearer

and nearer to the cop car, I reckoned they'd have to be blind, stupid, or both,

not to think

there was something fishy.

We passed it! Nothing happened! Amazing!

Eventually we arrived in Sheffield. We all had gloves on of course,

but just in case John decided to wipe the car down, so he took it away

somewhere and dumped it. An hour later he was back.

This was almost 40 years ago and nobody would ever believe it any way.

I certainly don't. Lets face it its ridiculous!

[Guest topcatnumpty1]

No Robert from the shop--i wud say that,s totally believable!1

T.C

[Guest Swish]

Hiya TC

Well whether its true ir not its nowt to do with me. I'm just a bloke who works in a shop-as you correctly pointed out.

Much love to you and Leslie.

And if you send me a few more of those good CD's I wont say it was you.

Hows that for a deal?

[Kegsy]

Hmmmm I Fear I may featue in this book at some stage.

Kegsy

[Guest Swish]

Indeed you will Kegsy.

BUT just send me 4 packets of baccy a week and I'll leave you out.

Take care old bud.

Much love

Swish

[Guest POTTERIESPECK]

It wasn't like normal people with normal plans.

A lot of it was "Let's go where the music takes me ******* I'll buy your book just for that line alone. PURE CLASS But is it only us normal people who can relate to it Swish. I wonder what the proper normal people thought of us when were of our heads ? Argh ya know whay i mean.

[Guest Swish]

It wasn't like normal people with normal plans.

A lot of it was "Let's go where the music takes me ******* I'll buy your book just for that line alone. PURE CLASS But is it only us normal people who can relate to it Swish. I wonder what the proper normal people thought of us when were of our heads ? Argh ya know whay i mean.

Indeed POTTERIE SPECK I wonder what they thought of us.

Like, say, you were at your grannies birthday party,listening to Russ Conway or some similar shite, comingup, smashed, cant wait to get away to get the train to the nighter, thinking how best you can make your excuse and get the hell out of there.

For all we know, they were thinking "I wish this idiot would fuck off" LOL.

[Guest suehey]

great thread Swish keep em coming

[Petedillon]

Swish, me thinks this book could be very interesting my friend. how many years have you been writing it? or is it a new venture?

[Guest Swish]

Swish, me thinks this book could be very interesting my friend. how many years have you been writing it? or is it a new venture?

I've been writing it forever. it should have been done and dusted 10 years ago.

i got a 101 excuses why its not done yet. I won't bore you with them all.

One reason, though, is that i only enjoy writing it (or indeed writing anywhere (forums etc) is when I'm a bit on the high side. In fact i love writing when feeling that way. I wrote about 2000 posts on a race horse forum before I packed betting in about 4 or 5 years ago.

I've written about 1600 posts on a poker forum i like to go on. I've been barred from 1 soul forum and one poker forum for being honest and forhright and speaking my mind. i could, perhaps have got barred from here but I guess the moderators took int account that someone deeply upset me. I thank them for taking that into account as I like it here.

Anyway another catch is is that when I start to feel a little on the high side I decide to write some more of my book, but think, oh, I'll just have a little game of internet poker first.

10 hours later I am still playing the bloody poker . Joke is although I am pretty good at live poker, I'm crap at internet poker. HA HA HA HA HA.

Anyway I have about 173 pages on computer and about 50 written on typewriter.

I promised some of my best mates and a few who bollocked me at the Torch reunion that I shall finish it by the end of 2011. (AND EVEN THAT WILL BE ONLY UP TO 1977, cos that's when I got married. If its successful I may write part 2.

There's going to be at least 400, maybe 600, pages just to 1977.

Also i have emotional problems when writing it. As you know many of our mates are dead now, and so are those times and days, quite often i just get too emotional and can't do it. Also I don't want it to be a novel as some have suggested, I want it to be as right as i can possibly do it.

I swear though to you and all who've asked I shall finish it before the end of 2011 at the latest.

I give my word right now.

[Guest]

I've been writing it forever. it should have been done and dusted 10 years ago.

i got a 101 excuses why its not done yet. I won't bore you with them all.

One reason, though, is that i only enjoy writing it (or indeed writing anywhere (forums etc) is when I'm a bit on the high side. In fact i love writing when feeling that way. I wrote about 2000 posts on a race horse forum before I packed betting in about 4 or 5 years ago.

I've written about 1600 posts on a poker forum i like to go on. I've been barred from 1 soul forum and one poker forum for being honest and forhright and speaking my mind. i could, perhaps have got barred from here but I guess the moderators took int account that someone deeply upset me. I thank them for taking that into account as I like it here.

Anyway another catch is is that when I start to feel a little on the high side I decide to write some more of my book, but think, oh, I'll just have a little game of internet poker first.

10 hours later I am still playing the bloody poker . Joke is although I am pretty good at live poker, I'm crap at internet poker. HA HA HA HA HA.

Anyway I have about 173 pages on computer and about 50 written on typewriter.

I promised some of my best mates and a few who bollocked me at the Torch reunion that I shall finish it by the end of 2011. (AND EVEN THAT WILL BE ONLY UP TO 1977, cos that's when I got married. If its successful I may write part 2.

There's going to be at least 400, maybe 600, pages just to 1977.

Also i have emotional problems when writing it. As you know many of our mates are dead now, and so are those times and days, quite often i just get too emotional and can't do it. Also I don't want it to be a novel as some have suggested, I want it to be as right as i can possibly do it.

I swear though to you and all who've asked I shall finish it before the end of 2011 at the latest.

I give my word right now.

I for one , will hold you to your promise Bob ........ if you do not , I want the meal voucher you still have from The Junction

Malc