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Don't You Dare Laugh At Me


Pete S

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You couldn't make it up.

I got this vinyl record to fix for someone, it had a one inch crack at the edge, so I manipulated the vinyl so that the break was super smooth and shouted for Davina to get the superglue - I wanted her to put a tiny blob right on the edge of the record to seal the crack.

So I'm holding the crack together tightly, she puts the glue on the spot where I told her to, but she put too much on and before I could do anything, my left index finger was stuck to the b side of this record. Not just the tip of my finger, nearly all of the top of my finger was stuck like cement.

So then I started to panic, I have a 7" record stuck to my finger, I feel like one of those Amazonian tribesmen who have the plates stuck in their lip, how am I going to drive with a record stuck to my hand? I have to pick Sam up from school in 10 minutes, maybe I should wear a giant oven glove and tell the other parents that I was in the middle of cooking and didn't notice I hadn't taken the glove off?

Eventually I soaked my hand and the record in hot water and then tried to cut the glue off, still not working, so eventually I just ripped it off, leaving half my skin stuck to the b side of this record.

All this time Davina was laughing so hard she was turning red and I thought she was going to explode.

Mick Smith phones, Davina answers the phone and tells him I can't come to the phone because I have my hand stuck to a record with superglue and the fire brigade are on their way. Bitch.

So anyway, the record got fixed, it clicks a few times but plays fine, the B side however does not play because my finger is still stuck to it.

Don't you dare laugh at me!

Edited by Pete S
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You couldn't make it up.

I got this vinyl record to fix for someone, it had a one inch crack at the edge, so I manipulated the vinyl so that the break was super smooth and shouted for Davina to get the superglue - I wanted her to put a tiny blob right on the edge of the record to seal the crack.

So I'm holding the crack together tightly, she puts the glue on the spot where I told her to, but she put too much on and before I could do anything, my left index finger was stuck to the b side of this record. Not just the tip of my finger, nearly all of the top of my finger was stuck like cement.

So then I started to panic, I have a 7" record stuck to my finger, I feel like one of those Amazonian tribesmen who have the plates stuck in their lip, how am I going to drive with a record stuck to my hand? I have to pick Sam up from school in 10 minutes, maybe I should wear a giant oven glove and tell the other parents that I was in the middle of cooking and didn't notice I hadn't taken the glove off?

Eventually I soaked my hand and the record in hot water and then tried to cut the glue off, still not working, so eventually I just ripped it off, leaving half my skin stuck to the b side of this record.

All this time Davina was laughing so hard she was turning red and I thought she was going to explode.

Mick Smith phones, Davina answers the phone and tells him I can't come to the phone because I have my hand stuck to a record with superglue and the fire brigade are on their way. Bitch.

So anyway, the record got fixed, it clicks a few times but plays fine, the B side however does not play because my finger is still stuck to it.

Don't you dare laugh at me!

laugh.giflaugh.giflaugh.giflaugh.giflaugh.gif

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You couldn't make it up.

I got this vinyl record to fix for someone, it had a one inch crack at the edge, so I manipulated the vinyl so that the break was super smooth and shouted for Davina to get the superglue - I wanted her to put a tiny blob right on the edge of the record to seal the crack.

So I'm holding the crack together tightly, she puts the glue on the spot where I told her to, but she put too much on and before I could do anything, my left index finger was stuck to the b side of this record. Not just the tip of my finger, nearly all of the top of my finger was stuck like cement.

So then I started to panic, I have a 7" record stuck to my finger, I feel like one of those Amazonian tribesmen who have the plates stuck in their lip, how am I going to drive with a record stuck to my hand? I have to pick Sam up from school in 10 minutes, maybe I should wear a giant oven glove and tell the other parents that I was in the middle of cooking and didn't notice I hadn't taken the glove off?

Eventually I soaked my hand and the record in hot water and then tried to cut the glue off, still not working, so eventually I just ripped it off, leaving half my skin stuck to the b side of this record.

All this time Davina was laughing so hard she was turning red and I thought she was going to explode.

Mick Smith phones, Davina answers the phone and tells him I can't come to the phone because I have my hand stuck to a record with superglue and the fire brigade are on their way. Bitch.

So anyway, the record got fixed, it clicks a few times but plays fine, the B side however does not play because my finger is still stuck to it.

Don't you dare laugh at me!

Has the piece of Smith skin increased the value of the record ?

Malc Burton

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Guest TONY ROUNCE

That'll be the spirit of all those Carstairs 45s you've broken getting its revenge...

Cheer up, mate, it might could have been an LP!:good:

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i'm stuck on my baby - irene and scotts

stuck on you - yvonne carroll

not forgettin ...

barkays - 'sore' fingerwhistling

i think pete has set himself up here......

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You couldn't make it up.

I got this vinyl record to fix for someone, it had a one inch crack at the edge, so I manipulated the vinyl so that the break was super smooth and shouted for Davina to get the superglue - I wanted her to put a tiny blob right on the edge of the record to seal the crack.

So I'm holding the crack together tightly, she puts the glue on the spot where I told her to, but she put too much on and before I could do anything, my left index finger was stuck to the b side of this record. Not just the tip of my finger, nearly all of the top of my finger was stuck like cement.

So then I started to panic, I have a 7" record stuck to my finger, I feel like one of those Amazonian tribesmen who have the plates stuck in their lip, how am I going to drive with a record stuck to my hand? I have to pick Sam up from school in 10 minutes, maybe I should wear a giant oven glove and tell the other parents that I was in the middle of cooking and didn't notice I hadn't taken the glove off?

Eventually I soaked my hand and the record in hot water and then tried to cut the glue off, still not working, so eventually I just ripped it off, leaving half my skin stuck to the b side of this record.

All this time Davina was laughing so hard she was turning red and I thought she was going to explode.

Mick Smith phones, Davina answers the phone and tells him I can't come to the phone because I have my hand stuck to a record with superglue and the fire brigade are on their way. Bitch.

So anyway, the record got fixed, it clicks a few times but plays fine, the B side however does not play because my finger is still stuck to it.

Don't you dare laugh at me!

laugh.giflaugh.gif Funny as f..... great story Pete

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I didn't realise they made that, I need some!

I also need my car back - could you give him another nudge for me? Ta :-)

That's strange, I just got this thread up to read it to Nick so he could rip the pi.. when he saw you...wicked.gif

We're hoping to pop over in the morning after I've took the kids to school if that's ok with you.

It's lovely and clean...wink.gif

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That's strange, I just got this thread up to read it to Nick so he could rip the pi.. when he saw you...wicked.gif

We're hoping to pop over in the morning after I've took the kids to school if that's ok with you.

It's lovely and clean...wink.gif

Fantastic - only one problem - we have a meeting with Santander business manager at 1.30 and have to drop the kids off at 12, so if I'm not there, I'm really sorry, but you can just leave it in our parking space next to the red nissan if thats ok. Thanks Sian :thumbsup:

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Fantastic - only one problem - we have a meeting with Santander business manager at 1.30 and have to drop the kids off at 12, so if I'm not there, I'm really sorry, but you can just leave it in our parking space next to the red nissan if thats ok. Thanks Sian hatsoff2.gif

No worries, we'll try and get there before you go but the traffics not much fun up your way.

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as you peeled your finger off did you utter those immortal words

"it really hurts me girl" thumbup.gif

:thumbsup:

Surprised it took to post 31 for someone to quote the obvious one.

Couple more :D :-

Bobby Valentin - Use It Before He Glue's It

Lee David - Pete's Glue Gun Is Calling My Name

Pete Smith & the Inspirations - Touch Me,Hold Me, A&E ! :yes:

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